Chiaroscuro

Ask anyone who has known me from childhood, and they will tell you that I have always been quite morbid. My fascination with death and dying started at a young age when a neighbor boy killed an alley cat out back from our house in Brooklyn. When the older kids in the neighborhood found that cat they all turned away in disgust whilst I stared in amazement. To many I'm sure, I seem to be a troubled person; one who must have endured something tragic in their childhood.... quite honestly I had a fantastic childhood. My parents were the BEST!

I suppose my fascination with death and dying is spawned from my need to know things; to have a solidified answer to the unknown. In college I took a class called On Death and Dying. It was singlehandedly one of the best classes I have ever taken. We discussed death and dying on so many different levels. From the nature of the actual event to the spiritual side of things. Other students in the class ranged from those who needed the course for their majors, to those who worked or wanted to work in a field related to the topic. ( The student I got along with the most was of course the daughter of a funeral director. She was taking the course in preparation of one day taking over the family business.)  I guess the course interested me the most because it not only dealt with ordinary thoughts on death like grief and ideas of an afterlife but the cold reality that is death. What happens to families after a loved one passes? What is done to the actual physical body? etc etc. I know to some those details seem gruesome and gory but thats life people, in all its glory.

From this class I grasped a meaning for death and that is LIFE. Without having lived your death is meaningless. What I mean by that is: By taking any kind of journey through your life be it small or large, you have crossed paths with others. While you walk down your path your presence touches those around you; for better or worse YOU have meaning. When that journey ends in its physical form your being still lives on in the people with whom you touched. Your death has meaning because you lived. In order to cherish what we have and learn from those around us death needs to be a factor in the equation that is life. Without death your life would have no worth, no value, it would be trivial. It would not be treasured. In the same respect, without life your death would have no meaning. There is light in the dark and dark in the light. Our lives and our deaths are an array of emotions, events, and necessities. Without all the "in between" from start to finish life and death would be inconsequential.

Maybe its a higher power or maybe its just the natural order of things but it feels like a hand at times carries us, holds us, and even buries us. All  things come to an end but like the shading techniques of the great artists of the world, our lives are various shades that go from light to dark- dark to light. The good and the bad. Life and Death. Without one we can not have the other. The "chiaroscuro" effect helps to balance things and provide transition for us from birth to death. In the end our grasp of our own mortality is what makes us human.

** I know this entry was a bit jumbled - its been awhile and I started this blog entry in February 2011 and am now just finishing it!

Busy Bee

Sorry I have been MIA people but a lot has happened over the course of the past few months. None of which are more important than the most recent development.... I"M ENGAGED! So understand that the blogs will begin again shortly. Patience!!!!

Thanks!

Slutty Wedding Sex

Inspired by one of my favorite shows, One Tree Hill, wedding sex is a hot topic amoungst twenty something females. In the years where everyone and their mother are getting hitched and having children, the dreaded wedding season is one that the twenty something female absolutely hates! If your single, the thoughts that cross your mind are as follows:

Will I ever find that special someone? 

Why am I single? 

Will I be the last one to marry? 

and of course....

Who can I sleep with at the wedding?

The weeks leading up to the pending nuptials of a friend are always the hardest for the single twenty something girl. While you put on a brave face, along with your other single girl friends, inside you are loathing the idea of spending the reception dancing and eating alone. So you decide to get your hair and nails done. You choose a stunning dress and plan on celebrating the day with your bride-to-be friend. You decide to join her in the joy of this monumental occasion and put aside your selfish thoughts. But lets be honest here people, no matter what you say, those selfish thoughts will continue to rear their ugly heads and the sizing up of young men begins at the church even when you should be focusing on your friend, who's pristine makeup is running down her face. After a few drinks at the reception and noticing some of the why is that girl alone looks from some of the older guests you plan on what most single ladies plan on.... the hot slutty wedding sex. You surrey the dance floor, which has now taken the form of a high school dance, to see if there are any attractive single men. Like a pinball you ricochet from table to table gabbing away to any guy that will listen to you. You are out on the prowl and just looking for some fun. If successful, you will find your slutty wedding sex buddy. 

Now most of the time the gentleman that is envisioned for said act is a complete stranger or possibly a member of the wedding party. Unfortunately, from many stories shared by friends this guy often turns out to be a close friend, an ex, or even worse the grooms handsome younger brother yikes! 

Tales of Wedding Sex

I had a friend once, the endless romantic type, tell me that she thought she met Mr. Right. They had a lot in common and spent the whole evening talking. No one had seen this mysterious Mr. Right she spoke of. Some must have finally thought she went over the deep end. They talked, they danced, and then they had slutty wedding sex. She was completely enamored with him until she started to sober up. She realized maybe they didn't have that much in common and come to think of it she was doing all the talking. He spent the evening dodging questions and simply agreeing with her in every instance. (Which is... let's be honest what every girl loves... a guy who agrees with her) She pulled away one of our other friends to tell her all the details of her rendezvous. Finally, like a scene from a movie, the dance floor parts and Mr. Right is standing there. "Omg", our friend exclaims! She gathers up all of us to reveal that Mr. Right was the groom's little brother and by little I mean little. None of us had seen him in years since he was in middle school. Immediately, you could see the wheels turning and everyone doing the math in the heads frantically. Mr. Right was a senior in high school!

Now, slutty wedding sex does not only apply to the twenty-something female. For one of my male friends, who is always on the prowl, slutty wedding sex ended in quite an unusual place. As I stated my friend is the forever bachelor. He is a great guy but I believe until the right girl commits to him, and he knows who it is, he will wander from woman to woman. Anyway, back to the point, while at a wedding he met a fantastic woman. She was beautiful and intelligent. They had a great fling. He was really happy he met her. Not that he was planning on continuing a relationship with her after the wedding but he was not expecting what happened next. The day after the wedding everyone reconvened for Sunday brunch. He spots the woman he met the evening before and like a gentleman moves towards her table. She doesn't look as pleased to see him as he thought. He sits down at the table and everyone begins to introduce themselves. A new addition to the group is a gentleman sitting on the opposite side of our one night stand woman. He introduces himself to my friend as the woman's husband. WOW! Didn't see that coming!

Some Ettiquette

Now, slutty wedding sex is a general component of the twenty something wedding and from what I have learned from friends--- never ends well. Along with slutty wedding sex people partake in many other activities that they would normally deem inappropriate. So the next time you attend a wedding please follow my 4 simple rules. First and foremost remember that grandparents and children are present. Keep the dancing somewhat proper. Do not prance around like a stripper! Secondly, easy on the buffet! After a night of dancing and drinking the buffet is not always the best thing the second time around. Third, do not live out your fantasies from high school and seek that jock or cheerleader you always wanted. Even if you end up finding them and reliving the dream the next day the fantasy will be over. Last but not least, try to keep the slutty wedding sex on the back burner- remember the reason you are at the wedding is to celebrate the love found between your friend and their significant other.

Welcome to the World of Blogging: A Tale of my Blogging Experiences

Where shall I begin? 

I guess starting off with telling you a little about myself. My name is Cerrissa. I was born in Brooklyn, NY where I lived until the age of 10 and my family moved to Jackson, NJ. My mother is of Puerto Rican decent whereas my father is Chinese. I have one older sister and a beautiful niece. I went to an All Girls Boarding School called Miss Halls School in Pittsfield, MA. Following my studies there I attended Lafayette College in Easton, PA. After college I moved to Washington, DC; where I currently reside. I live in a part of DC called Glover Park with my boyfriend Matt, our roommate Rachel, and our dog Hershey. (Matt needed me to also include that he is awesome, sexy, and debonair. This should be a good introduction to him for you all.) As for a profession, you name it I've done it. I've been a teacher, retail store manager, an aide to the first justice of Massachusetts, a nanny, bartender, a tutor, an environmental consultant assistant, and even a truck stop employee. My varied experiences in both my professional and personal life have caused my friends to say "you really need to write this sh**t down sometime". I'm glad I can amuse someone. So, today I thought to myself ...let's do it!


So thinking back through all the years the whole blogging thing seemed to me just another way for someone who lacks social graces to occupy their time. You know the socially inept, those that sit idle in front of a computer screen living their lives through the streaming Internet. I guess envisioned in my head were these dungeons and dragons "geeks" on their computers from sun up to sun down blogging about tech savvy new toys, games, and programs. Well, over the years I guess I have come to be one of those "geeks". I would have never imagined myself answering, checking, let alone writing a blog 2 years ago, yet here we are!
  

The first encounter with the ever allusive BLOG...

I guess the first time I came across the blogging community was after watching an episode of Lost. Mind you this was one of my favorite shows and with my endless need to have control over things I stepped into the lions den. This was one of those shows that as much as I loved the plot twists and mysterious smoke monster (For those who know not of said monster I swear its not nearly as dorky as it sounds... but I digress) I hated not knowing what was going on. So, I reached for my computer and there began my obsession with the Lost blog. Every episode thereafter I found myself chatting away with fellow "losties" about theories. I was happy to find other people with an insatiable need to know or have control over things. I suppose after that I was done for.

Lightning Strikes Twice

I dragged myself away from the Lost blogs when it reached a point of obsession. ( lol yes that is the point I waited for) When even my friends made fun of me for chatting online about a TV show. After missing a few of the blogs I was fine. Like a nicotine addict gone cold turkey days 1-3 were hard but once I reached day 7 I was perfectly fine. Why, you may ask.... I found a new obsession of course! My addictive personality reared its ugly head and with a nonchalant wave of its hand said "Hello Perez Hilton". Now, I am in full fledged blog mode. Every chance I get I'm pulling out my computer or blackberry to check whats going on in the world of celebrity or in the world of my friends. I guess the advances the last few years with connecting people via internet have aided in my conversion to a blog friendly life style. With the help of websites like myspace, linkin, and of course everyones favorite distraction facebook, the blogging world has become more of an accepted past- time. Well, I guess in my eyes at least and truthfully its my blog so I will go right ahead and say it  Yes, Cerrissa you are correct. 

So, there it is.... the first blog entry. Boring yes but we need to start with the basics here people. I am sure I've forgotten to write a lot down about myself and what I want from this blog but I promise to have that all figured out by next week! 

Until then this blog will be under construction!!!!